Sugar and Spice...

Having raised four boys, I have always felt like I had a handle on parenting…

If not a handle, maybe at the very least, a fire extinguisher to put out the fires of teenagerdom (not an actual word, but I’ve added it to my list of “should be’s” that I plan to send in to Webster’s very soon)

I must reiterate, however, the lack of clarity that I feel in the murky, unchartered waters that I am treading through in the deep end these days, due to the fact that I am dealing with a fifteen-year-old daughter…

My friend Karen has three daughters…
Whenever I mention new worries that come with having to deal with estrogen, other than my own (and mine could be dwindling as we speak, as I am reminded constantly by my headaches and strong urges to turn the thermostat below the 79 degree threshold that Tony tries to enforce (see here to fully understand)… I’m a rebel however, and it’s blowing like crazy at this very moment, because I’ve turned it to 78 again!) She waves her hand at me dismissively, as if to say "My Poor Little Grasshopper, When you can take the pebble from my hand, then you'll know"
Usually followed up with cryptic advice, delivered with a sly smile “Just Wait”

For what?! I ask… no, I demand to know!

Then she breaks down into maniacal laughter and walks away…
(Not really, but I seriously think that she wants to, because misery usually loves company)

My daughter is lovely…

Truly…

But as I’ve mentioned before, Girls are complicated creatures and quite frankly, I feel that I am in over my head for several reasons…

1) BOYS – okay… I adore my boys, but I also understand that their ploy to be any girls’ friend when they were teenagers meant one thing…. They LIKED them and wanted to KNOW them… and by “know them” I mean suck-face with. This knowledge has completely ruined my daughters’ chances for being allowed to hang out one on one with any of her guy friends…
NOT HAPPENING!
PERIOD!

2) Girls are waaayyyy more social, therefore I am constantly being bombarded with new names, faces and plans… It’s not unusual for the discussions to begin on Monday about what she wants to do on Friday, Saturday and Sunday….
It’s exhausting! Many times I put a crimp in the plan (because I am trying my very hardest to ruin her life and so it must be done to accomplish said task)

3) Three words:

• Premenstrual
• Menstrual
• Postmenstrual

It’s like a hormonal firestorm for at least 27 ½ days on any given month!



Having said all that…

I must also mention that I absolutely adore her and she is a joy (at this point, for at least 3 ½ days every month)

NOT really! She is a joy every single day and I am grateful that she’s mine!

At this stage of the game, most days, I can’t confidently say that I’m sure she feels the same about me…

But that’s okay…

Because according to my girl expert, Karen,

That means that I must be doing something right!