My BFF is ISO a NGBF...

My bff announced recently that she wants a 'new gay best friend'
I'm not kidding...
That's exactly what she said to me...

I wasn't really sure what to do with that news... I mean, was she implying that her old best friend (Me) was gay but she wanted a a new one?
Because if that's the case, she's had me pegged all wrong, all along...
You would have thought that the husband and five kids would have tipped her off years ago!

Or could it be that she was suggesting I experiment by 'switching teams'? That wasn't going to happen... It's just not "Me"....

The hurt and puzzled look on my face prompted her to delve deeper... "Oh you stupid old cow!" she said (she's English... she says things like this to me all the time)
She continued... "I meant I would love to have a gay man-friend that loves to shop and we could go to the mall together and then have lunch too!"


"You mean, like WE do?" I said

She laughed "Yes... But you aren't a gay man"

Thank heavens for small favors...
(before you get your panties in a wad... I am happy with who I am, and don't want to be a man; gay or otherwise)


I told her that she's been watching too many Bravo Television shows, and that she has romanticized herself into movie characters; like Julia Roberts in My Best Friend's Wedding... remember her gay best guy friend? He was fantastic!

I tried to make a couple of points to her:

• Not every gay man is as fun as Rupert Everett was in the aforementioned movie
• It's not fair to stereotype ... I'm certain that all gay men don't, in fact, like to shop
• Okay... Okay... they do all eat lunch... I'll give her that

I told her that I am happy with my friends... I accept them all for who they are...
I'm not looking for more...

She's on a Mish though... (that's UK talk for 'mission')
Knowing her, she will find the Rupert Everett kind of GBF... and they will go shopping... and have lunch...
and they may even invite me along...
and... yes... I'll probably go...
and I'll have a great time...
(as well as coming home with a wealth of fashion tips... from him... not her...)


and afterwards, although I will never tell her, I'll secretly be on a quest to find my own GBF or at least 'borrow' hers, when she isn't looking...