Blow, blow, blow your nose...

I've been camped out on my couch for three days now...
Somehow, in the midst of all of the merriment...
all of the holiday kisses that were bestowed on me by friends and acquaintances as well as their husbands...
SOMEONE infected me with the crud...

So as I've lain on the couch "lounging" as my family would call it ("suffering"would be a more accurate description) life has continued to march on...

Here is a list of what I have accomplished in the last three days:

1) I've watched 17 movies...none in their entirety...
some I've attempted four times... still I've dozed...

2) I've picked up as well as driven kids... in my pajamas...
that's what I do...sick or not (and moaning and weeping doesn't seem to deter family members from asking me to help them out in some way)

3) I've blown my nose exactly 3,872 times... of those blows, 3,792 were done into paper napkins because I've long since run out of my beloved Puffs Plus and only remember that fact after Tony has left for his 12 hour shift at work

4) I've taken to rubbing lip balm under my nose (see #3)

I'm feeling a tad bit better this morning, and am contemplating the best way to decontaminate my couch...

Does Lysol come in industrial strength?

SPRITZ COOKIES - DENIED!!!

We are getting down to the wire here to finish a load of things before the big guy comes on Wednesday night..

I am finding that the older I get, the less organized I seem to become, largely due to the fact that my life gets more complicated and the logistics of it all cause me to forget normal, every day things...
like my children's names...
or if Tony likes tomatoes in his salad...

He does NOT.... (as he reminded me for the 826th time just the other day)

Actually, I have never been THAT organized...
but truthfully, I am one of the few who don't stress over stuff like that...
I stress over other things...

Like why people are mean to each other...

and why...for the LOVE OF GOD... do they make full figured sized clothes with horizontal stripes??!!

I mean ... there ought to be a law...

So today I dragged myself back to the store for the 4th time in as many days and grabbed all of my baking supplies for my annual Pre-Christmas kitchen marathon...

I came home and got "the look" from my man that said "You spent waaaay too much money didn't you??!"
He doesn't scare me!
No siree!

Because I know what he likes...
and food is near the top of the list...
and sweets come in on the top of his foods list...

So in a day or so, he'll forget all about the money spent at the grocery store and be focusing on deciding which treat to eat first...

He threw me a tiny curve ball though when he said "Hey... please don't bother to make those plain cookies this year... they aren't very good and no one really eats them"

"You mean my Spritz cookies?" I inquired with disbelief in my voice.

"Yeah.... no one really likes them and they usually get tossed out"

So I took a few seconds to think about this...

the spritz cookies...

which always take me five times longer to make than any other cookie that I make...

No one likes??!!


YIPPIE!!!!!
WHOO-HOO!!!

I knew that my work had just been cut in half so instead of being insulted....
he actually made my day....

I definitely married the right guy for me!!!

B-I-N-G-O!!

In my usual style of being politically incorrect...


Walmart stands alone in the "store where you can buy just about anything" department...

But WOW! I surely do hate it (with a burning passion)

and vow never to return each and every time I walk out of there!!


I constantly am amazed at the level of rudeness that I encounter every time I shop there!


Against every fiber of my being, I ventured to the Super Walmart just the other day on a quest for Christmas goodies for GGTP #1 and GTP #2.


I entered with a spring in my step...
a grin on my face...
and a heart filled with Christmas Cheer...


I left with a much lighter wallet...
a migraine...
and a right hook that was aching to be released on one of the 47 people who either left their shopping cart in the middle of the aisle while perusing both sides in a zig-zag pattern OR coughed "at me" without even attempting to cover their mouth...


I always find myself wondering where all of the other people shopping there came from...

For instance, I never see entire families with mullets anywhere else...

not that there's anything wrong with mullets per se.... they just aren't something that I see anywhere but Walmart...


Puzzling...


My good friend L sent me this printable Bingo card to take with me next time I go so that maybe I won't get so annoyed because I will be focused on getting "four corners" or "diagonal" first. Or for those larger shopping excursions, "cover-all"...


Check it out...and feel free to print it out and take along on your next Walmart Trek!!!

Click on the mini-bingo card below to view:

How Dry I Am....

One of my BFF's is a tad bit dramatic... and she is always coming up with some reason to be concerned about her health...
This often times makes me laugh...
I am really not trying to be cruel... but sometimes I simply cannot help myself!

Her worries have ranged anywhere from early onset Alzheimer's (H-e-l-l-o!!! We ALL forget things M!!)
to
Headaches that she is convinced must be indicative of a brain tumor...

Here's an excerpt from our latest health discussion that took place a couple of days ago:

She - "My right eye is dry all the time lately"

Me - "Have you tried lubricating drops? You can buy them in the contact lens department at CVS"

She - "It's the start of something"

Me - "What?"

She - "You know.... menopause!"

Me - "Menopause???!!! What's that have to do with your eye?!"

She - "It's starting with my eye drying up... next it will be my skin.... then my "bits" (which is totally the way she refers to her "lady parts")

Me - "So you're telling me that this dry eye thing will end in your nether-regions?!" (which is what I like to call my "bits")

She - "That's EXACTLY what I'm telling you!"


I chuckled to myself about this for the rest of the day...

I mean, her reasoning is soooo silly!!!!

But now she's put that thought in my head...
and come to think of it....

MY right eye has been feeling kind of dry lately...

Specificity .... is a GOOD Thing....

Our kayak buying friend learned a valuable lesson last weekend that I felt worth passing on...

When conducting an internet search for, let's say... the store hours for the sporting goods shop where you purchased your kayaks...

TRY to be specific to ensure desired results...

He learned the hard way (pun intended) that if you aren't careful while searching, you might get an eyeful of something that could send you running to a corner to suck your thumb and cry for your mommy!!!!

I won't go into particulars, but instead will give you a general idea of the trauma that he inflicted upon himself last weekend...


(Click on image to view full size)

"DICKS" - NO

"DICKS SPORTING GOODS" - YES

R O Y G B I V Revisited

Tony and I purchased Kayaks on Black Friday...

Actually, our friend was going to fight the crowds to buy himself two kayaks, so I asked if he would please just pick up a couple more for us...

I realize that it is a tad bit more inconvenient than asking someone to pick you up a loaf of bread, but there was some serious reasoning behind this...

This way there would be two less people filling up the store...

PLUS

We were just trying to do our part to help with crowd control...

He didn't buy that story either...

Being the good guy that he is, he agreed anyway, but also hinted that he might not be willing to get up at 5 a.m. to ensure said purchase...

In the end, he scored big time and called to let us know that we were now the proud owners of shiny new kayaks...
One yellow, one red...

Only one facet of this entire experience was going to cause me stress...
I now was faced with the deciding which color I wanted...
Tony always lets me choose first.. because he's a good guy.... he wants me to be happy...
This is a good thing...

EXCEPT -

I have a terrible time making those kinds of decisions!!

It's weird... I know!!!
I've raised five children and made literally thousands of choices that were FAR more important than this, yet each and every time I am faced with a judgment call of the color palate variety, I agonize over it...

My initial reaction was "I definitely wanted the red one...."
no question about it...
Then I started wondering if I would tire of paddling around in a kayak the color of an atomic fireball...

"I may want the yellow one..." is what I announce to my guy several hours later
I'm pretty sure that this was totally, NOT a surprise to him.

Over the past several days I have vacillated like this repeatedly.

(We have been toying with idea of buying a new car and I know that a color decision of that magnitude would probably necessitate a prescription of some sort!!)

But there is good news!!!!
I've decided that I am going to stick with my original color choice... RED!!!


Most Likely...