I’ll give you something to cry about…
Ever hear that one when you were a kid?
My Dad used to use that little ditty on us all of the time…
I was never quite sure what he meant by it, because after all, he would say it to me when I was already crying…
I never dared ask him to clarify…
I might have been confused… but I wasn’t stupid!
I vowed to never, EVER use that kind of line on my children, but somehow, somewhere in between then and now, I turned into a parent of five and though I always have tried my hardest to be reasonable and fair, occasionally, I have had a “moment”
By “moment”, I mean ugly, ridiculous, unreasonable, rant and rave fest that, truth be told, is quite embarrassing!
In the past, I have sent out a warning message to all, when I feel I am reaching the threshold to my ‘point of no return’…
It’s a simple phrase… just five little words…
It’s-about-to-get-ugly!!!
That should be fair warning to get the heck out of dodge or at the very least to stop whatever they are doing that is causing my patience to wear thin…
‘Should’ is the operative word here.
In reality, for some reason, my children were all born with an off switch in their brains that short-circuits with regularity.
When they were still standing in heaven, they must have thought they were in the ‘sense’ line, but been in the ‘dense’ line… instead.
In actual fact, all of my offspring are quite intelligent; so don’t get me wrong when I say that they lack sense.
Come to think of it, they don’t lack common sense…
Their problem is directly related to the lack of ability to know when to stop drop and roll when they have pushed either of their parents to the brink…
Picture this – you are camping and your fire is smoldering (this represents me and my patience) and it happens to be time for lights out…
You (this represents my kids) have in front of you two items and it’s within your power to choose which to use…
One is a bucket of dirt…
The other is a bucket of gas…
Do I really have to spell it out?!
This type of ‘moment’ happens less than it used to, because in actual fact I am down to only two teenagers left at home to deal with daily.
When I had all five still living at home, ‘it got ugly’ all the time…
In truth, I have used the old ‘give you something to cry about’ line more than once…
There.
I’ve said it…
Guess what?
I feel better for getting that off my chest.
We are all only human after all…
So next time you have a moment with one of your kids and blast out one of your own lines from the past, remember not to be too hard on yourself…
Don’t close yourself in the bathroom and weep with guilt…
Because if I need to, I’ll come right over there and give you something to cry about!!
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