It's a Bird! It's a Plane!! It's Marge!!!

My BFF thinks she's Super Girl...
You know, the one who ISO a NGBF?
(she still hasn't found one)

Over the holidays she was trying to show her 16 year old son how to change a tire by way of walking him through the procedure...

Everything was going just fine until the jack began to slip and anticipating the ramifications of that, she did what any super hero would do...

She quite simply slipped her hand under the wheel well to catch the car before it fell...

Ordinary girls would never even attempt such a feat...

But due to her super-human powers, this was a piece of cake...

She simply eased the car to the ground so that no one got hurt...

Oh wait!!!

NO... Actually it went down more like this...

She simply grabbed the car with the INTENT of avoiding injuries, but instead, for some reason, her powers were being blocked by something
(she may have forgotten to put on her super suit that morning)
and she found herself pinned... by the hand.... between the wheel well and the tire....

Panic ensued, but soon cleared the way for quick thinking, and her hand was freed shortly after....bruised and battered, but not broken, thank God!

Some might hear this story and think to themselves that they would never do something like that....

But that's the thing about "stupid human tricks"...

We all do them...

Ever grab a cookie sheet with your bare hands ten seconds after you, yourself, just removed it from the 350 degree oven rack?!

Stupid Human Trick!!!

How about turning the keys in the ignition, only to find that you had already started it...(and then it makes that embarrassing noise that causes people to look to see which moron tried to start their already running car!!!)

Stupid Human Trick!!!

So before you judge ol' Super Girl... just remember that you, too, might get caught doing something without your super-suit on!

AXE and You Shall Receive...

Is it just me??!!

Has anyone else noticed that half of the world doesn't ask for help anymore??

They axe for help...

For heavens sake people!!!!

Just look at the word before uttering it!!!

Ask...

A-S-K...

There's nothing violent about it...

You cannot chop firewood with an ask...
You can with an axe however...

Once a lady told me that if I needed to know something I should just axe her...
I told her right up front that I would never react to needing to know anything by axing a person...

I mean, I'm a peaceful kind of girl...

I make love, not war...
(she was NOT amused)

Today came the final straw...
as I was working, I had to go to a US Government site to gather information...
As I was not familiar with the site, I went to a help section where I was directed to this link...

Within 20 seconds, I heard a gentleman explain to me that this tool would give me quick access to the most "axed" for data series in the Bureau of Labor Statistics...

I kid you not... click and listen...

This needs to stop, I'm sure you'll agree...

I have decided that from now on, everytime someone axes me something,
I will give them one of these posters that I have designed for just such occasions...

Do you think it will catch on??