Dnt txt my phn agn... evr....

I received a very unusual text message last night...
Before I go any further, you probably should know a few facts that are
important to this story...

FACT #1
I have a cell phone...
My teenage daughter does not...
But she thinks it's ours...
But it's not...
It's mine...
and mine alone...

I'm not completely heartless...
I do allow her to use it when we are hanging out at home at night to text her friends, etc...
She's really good at it too...
She can have like, I don't know, 30 conversations going on at once...

And even though she is sucking the life out of me on a daily basis, simply because she is a teenage girl, she is a great kid...

FACT #2
I was a bit of a semi-wild child when I was a teenager...
But I always flew under the radar, thus lowering the chances of getting in trouble...
I'm sure you can see where this is heading...
Because I wasn't always a rule follower, quite frankly it's hard to get things past me...

Although my adult kids will now occasionally confess to one or two times when they pulled one over on me...
They think because they are fathers themselves that there's nothing I can do about it...
Au contraire! (that's fancy-french for "Yeah...Right!")
Because what I can do, is wait for Karma to come back around and bite them in the patoot (which is Jackie-talk for REAR END!)

Okay, back to my text message of late...
I will give you the script using STB for stupid teenage boy and CLM in place of completely livid mom...

Here goes -

STB - Can you sneak out tonight?
CLM - Umm.. STB, this is G's mom and sending my daughter text messages like this
ever, could be seriously hazardous to your health!
STB - Oh, sorry
CLM - You should be STB! This is not a good way to make a positive
impression on me or cause me reason to ever trust you!

Silence followed by crickets chirping occasionally...

END OF TRANSMISSION....

My darling (nosy) husband then asks "Who was that?"
Poor seriously STB, who now will be known as, PSSTB, will never again gaze into my daughter's beautiful brown eyes!
Because now he has not only seriously angered a mom,
but he's turned a father into a lion...
a big, scary lion with sharp claws and pointy teeth
(and all lions have those embarrassing 'male' parts that swing all over the place that are also quite intimidating!)
PSSTB has done all of this, with just a few words he typed out with his thumbs...

I don't expect we'll be seeing PSSTB ever again... if he knows what's good for him...